Wednesday 15 June 2011

The story so far...

Hello dear reader! I say dear reader because I may not know you personally,but that's ok coz we have something in common;I.e my blogposts.Before I proceed dear reader,I'd like to take the time to thank you for taking time out to read my posts. The fact that you followed a link,typed my address in your 'go to...' Box or searched me on google means a lot to me. My eternal thanks go to you! Especially you who spread the word that is benny blow to your friends,I can't thank you all enough. Last I checked my blog statistics,I was at 300 pageviews. But what's funny is I logged in about a month ago and I swear I was at 500+ views! I don't know what happened to my other 200-something views,but I know they were there! Blogger,what did you guys do?? Anyway,300 is good considering that I havnt been at this for not more than three months. So,my intentions with this post where to try tell you what's been occupying my mind apart from sex,drugs and cartoons.I went fora
job interview yesterday. I thnk it went fine,I answered the FAQs pretty well and I think I scored high on the apptitude test. After all,I fancy myself smarter than your average bear! Now I am waiting on a call-back. All should be well but its not. I should be enthusiastic and filled with a sense of satisfaction (no matter how premature ). I should be,but I'm not. I'm kinda looking foward to copping some slim-fit suits and matching ties. Esquire magazine helped me see suits and ties in a different light. But on another day I might argue that ties are totally oppressive and remind me of lynchings! You see dear reader,when I was a toddler and even when I was slightly older,I always hoped to be a cartoonist. I didn't know that job existed until I watched Garfield and Friends and learnt that John drew cartoons for a living and to pay for Garfield's insatiable appetite for lasagna. But as things went,I studied to be an accountant. That's a story for
anothertime though! What I'm shooting at is I feel that I havnt entirely stayed true to myself. I should have pursued my dreams in their entirety and gone for them with the very same untainted pre-teen drive. Sadly I knew my dad would never let me do that as long as he was paying for my education. Besides,living in a third world country like mother Zambia though with its perks and invaluable experiences;can be a serious handicap. I feel if I get a job in accounting and audit I will have no time to follow my cartoonist ambitions (which by the way morphed into writing ambitions post puberty). I feel I'll have to cage my talents and only let them out at the weekend. Might aswell starve them and rattle the cage's bars and poke them with a stick.Suppressing dreams is like caging a majestic bird like a fish eagle. Dreams should be nurtured from the time of their outrageous innocence to the drunken pep talks you have with your mates. They should be free to the
worldno matter how much others may frown upon them and deem them stupid. They are still dreams non-the-less. People shouldn't beat them into they're closets and pack them into dusty little boxes! Someone posted something on facebook that said something like,"...if God has planted a dream in your heart,then you are totally capable of it and you are to heed its call..." . And I read that JFK used to say,"...If we do not do this,then who will do this?"On saturday morning I was talking to an old friend of mine. She told me she 'secretly' reads my blog and is patiently waiting for my first novel. Later that night in the club another guy said to me,"yo,how do you come up with that shit you post? You're crazy! I like what you write!" (Or something to that effect! I can't remember due to vodka induced memory lapses!). I do remember clearly how another friend came up to me later in the very same club and said to me,"Since a young age,I've respected you. Since
wayback in primary school you took drawing seriously and did your own thing,and I respected you then. I respect you now. You do your thing and you have character,a personality. Personality is something most people don't have here in zambia,but you have it and you don't care what poeple think... You do you and I respect that. I'm not saying I like you or I'm kissing your ass,but I RESPECT you...". That's all in the same day. Three times. And the next day,my girlfriend tells me to work towards writing instead of sulking and becoming that 'shoulda-woulda-coulda' guy. Tell me that's not somekind of omen? Tell me that's not a sign people like my shit? Tell me that's not reason enough for me to go hard on this writing dream? I do literally have people around the world reading my blog,500+ or not.That means I havnt sold out yet,right? I do plan to go ahead and work for the system. But I should be careful not to sell my soul for a monthly salary,a tie
anduncomfortable shoes. I must still make time for scribing and use my job to sponsor my dreams financial needs. I'll buy a better laptop or P.C,pay for an internet connection and buy more zoot grass. I intend to drastically cut back on going out and clubbing so I can focus on my writing. The party scene isn't all its cut out to be,even though I constantly lust for its illustrious illusions and bright lights. I will work,move out and quit my day job once I feel the time is right. But that's a story for another time. For now dear reader,Get.Wit.It.Or.Blow!

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